Staying Resolved

DUKE'S FIVE RULES FOR ACHIEVING NEW YEAR'S RESOLUTIONS

(and other important goals).

It's that time of the year when most of us have to concede that all those bold resolutions we made for the new year are not going to happen.

Here's a few simple tips as to how to stay on track and, if you get derailed, how to pick up and start over again.

1. Set an exciting vision, but go after realistic goals. This may be the year to get as buff as you were in high school, but you'd be doing really well if you took off and kept off 20 pounds, period. A string of intermediate successes is much easier to achieve than one big one, no matter how dramatic it may be. Follow the logic of those who attack Mt. Everest: establish and get to basecamps. Once you've achieved one basecamp, get ready for the next. You may find that what it takes to achieve one leg of the ascent is quite different than what's required at the next. A basecamp is a great place to reward yourself and prepare for the next part of the climb.

2. The second step is actually the hardest. Most of us start a lot of things easily and finish few of them. The second step is one that asks for some commitment and may actually pinch a little. We're all pretty good at turning dessert down once... and feeling righteous about it. It's turning it down the second night that demonstrates resolve. Mao was partly right: a journey of a thousand miles does start with a single step, but it depends on a second, third and so on.

3. I owe a departed Evergreen colleague for this one. Phil Harding was a great teacher and creative architect. He also prevailed through some mammoth personal struggles in his life. He told me once how he quit smoking, and his advice was brilliant. For a few days he changed everything. Instead of driving to work, he rode his bike. He had lunch at 12:30 instead of noon... and then he ordered things he never usually ate. He moved his bed from one side of the room to another and watched TV instead of reading, his usual habit before he went to sleep. He understood that to change one thing you need to break from all the other old habits that lock you in place.

4. Tell somebody what you're trying to do. Making a public commitment to change means that you know others are watching and they may just help you out. I'm convinced that the success of Weight Watchers(r) stems from the fact that once a week you have to climb on the scale in front of a little old lady who records your heft.

5. Expect to slip up. It's what you do next that makes the difference. There is a difference between grabbing a forbidden midnight snack and tearing off on a weeklong eating binge. The folks at South Beach Diet (notice how much I know about these weight loss plans) have it right. If you're going to fall off the wagon, then climb right back on. This is sort of the obverse of the second step rule: if you stumble, your next step needs to be back in the right direction.

I don't care if it's a couple of pounds, a few golf strokes, the garage you planned to clean up or all those cold calls you were going to make. Stick to my 5 rules and you'll be on the way to where you want to go.